Tag: Tom Kaden

Surprised By Listening

“The first duty of love is to listen.” ~Paul Tillich The summer between my freshman and sophomore years of college I needed a job to help pay my way through school. A dad of a very close friend of mine offered me a position as a security guard at a local hospital in New Jersey—after…
Read more

Cure Without Care

“Our tendency is to run away from the painful realities or to try to change them as soon as possible. But cure without care makes us into rulers, controllers, manipulators, and prevents a real community from taking shape. Cure without care makes us preoccupied with quick changes, impatient and unwilling to share each other’s burden.…
Read more

First World Problems

“There’s a lot of ugly things in this world, son. I wish I could keep ’em all away from you. That’s never possible.” Atticus Finch in To Kill a Mockingbird, by Harper Lee “I have three things I’d like to say today. First, while you were sleeping last night, 30,000 kids died of starvation or…
Read more

This Crucible of Love

Sunset and evening star,       And one clear call for me! And may there be no moaning of the bar,       When I put out to sea,  But such a tide as moving seems asleep,       Too full for sound and foam, When that which drew from out the boundless deep       Turns again home.   Twilight and evening bell,…
Read more

Look Up

“One of the most beautiful qualities of true friendship is to understand and to be understood.” —Lucius Annaeus Seneca  Sadly, far too few of us have relationships in which we truly understand and are understood. During a question and answer time after a noontime talk we gave to a local civic group, a man in…
Read more

Backslapping

“Authenticity is a collection of choices that we have to make every day. It’s about the choice to show up and be real. The choice to be honest. The choice to let our true selves be seen.” —Brené Brown  “What happens when people open their hearts? They get better.” —Haruki Murakami  As we share our…
Read more

Chapters (Tom)

“A father is a man who expects his son to be as good a man as he meant to be.” Frank A. Clark   The day was “supposed” to be one of the most meaningful days of my life—and it was—but for very different reasons than I expected. June 3, 2006. Our wedding day. It…
Read more

Security (The Worst Thing Isn’t The Last Thing)

“Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing.”                 Helen Keller It is Passover.…
Read more

Take the Long Way Home (To Be a Better Listener)

Several years ago, when I was in graduate school, a close friend shared very openly and honestly about the relationship she had with her dad growing up, “My dad is my hero. What he did for our family is remarkable.” I wanted to know more, so I asked her just what made him such an…
Read more

Why We May Need to Stop Using the Phrase – “Everything Happens for a Reason”.

“If that were God’s plan, it’s a bad bargain; I don’t want to have to deal with a God like that … My sense is God and I came to an accommodation with each other a couple of decades ago, where he’s gotten used to the things that I’m not capable of and I’ve come…
Read more