FAQ

So… you just listen?

Well… yes. And no. We believe that the loneliness epidemic can be resolved by learning to connect deeply with one another. This means that we have to be vulnerable, but first, we must know that we are truly being heard. We practice compassionate listening and train others to do the same, which leads to meaningful relationships. 

So, you provide friendship for people who are lonely?

Deep friendship is a two-sided relationship which consists of both parties being vulnerable, mutually respecting one another, sharing life together (the good and the bad), making time for one another, and refraining from judging each other. These kinds of friendships have become exceedingly rare, even though everyone needs them. We seek to model a one-sided friendship for a time for anyone who finds themselves in need, with the goal of strengthening existing relationships in each person’s life.

Who is “Someone”?

Someone To Tell It To does not use the terms “client,” “patient,” or other transactional titles for those we serve. Instead, we use the word “Someone” when referring both to those who listen and to those to whom we are listening. This emphasizes the normalcy of needing to be heard as well as the equality of the listening relationship. The listening relationship seeks to convey to everyone that they are Someone. Thus, you will see that we use the term as a proper noun throughout our materials.

Read more about Someone here
Why “Chief Encouragement Officers”?

We believe in a bottom-up business model, meaning that those traditionally seen to be at the “top” of the organization are really the ones at the bottom supporting those who are doing the work. As the founders and CEO’s, our role is to encourage our staff to do their very best work.

How do you keep yourselves healthy?

Our model is unique. We do all of our compassionate listening in pairs, which protects those we serve as well as ourselves. We can process what we hear without breaking confidentiality, which is one of our highest priorities. Because of the intense nature of so much of what we hear, we believe we are stronger together.

What do you hear most often?

In our technologically-connected world, studies are showing more and more that people may be lonelier than ever. All of us need to know that our stories matter and that Someone cares about the deeper truths and feelings of our lives. We hear stories of loss, grief, loneliness, uncertainty, fear, doubt, and questions about matters of faith.

Do you refer people?

We do have a growing list of referral networks. There are certain matters that people are living with that are outside our area of expertise. We listen without judgement and we don’t tell people what to do or what to believe. But sometimes, individuals need more therapeutic and medical help. In addition, we aren’t a crisis hotline, as we hope to establish deeper connections and relationships with those who reach out.

How do you meet people?

Most of the individuals we serve are based on referrals (as in, Someone knows of Someone else who is in need of a listening ear and a compassionate presence). We meet people in environments that are safe and comfortable for the individual through email exchanges, private social media conversations, over the phone, via text messages, and face-to-face interactions (visiting in hospitals, in homes, coffee shops, restaurants, etc.).

What is your fee structure?

We made a commitment early on that we would never turn someone away based on their ability to pay for our time. With that being said, we are strictly donation-based and rely on our generous supporters. Some individuals can pay us well for our time, others can’t. We don’t want money to be a hindrance to Someone receiving the care that they need.

How do I become a better listener?

Becoming a better listener isn’t as simple as learning a few tips and tricks; it’s more of an attitude than a concrete skill set. It takes patience and practice, and we encourage you to utilize both in your every day interactions! We also encourage you to check out the “Training” tab (under “Services”) to learn more about the compassionate listening training programs we offer.

How do I become an official Compassionate Listener?

If you navigate to the “Training” tab (under “Services”) you’ll find an interest form for becoming a Compassionate Listener. Please complete that form to receive more information about becoming a Compassionate Listener. Someone will be in touch with you shortly.

Can I become an official Compassionate Listener by myself?

Our desire is for everyone to practice compassionate listening, individually and otherwise! However, we do practice a two-by-two model, so all of our “official” Compassionate Listeners are sent out in pairs. If you would like to become a Compassionate Listener but do not have someone to pair with, don’t worry! We will pair you with another individual.